How often do you compare yourself to others? How much do you truly know about the person you are comparing yourself to? Comparison can actually be a helpful skill and, in fact, it's one we teach in DBT. Before I talk about the benefits of comparison, let's talk about the pitfalls. Looking on to another person and/or [...]
As we embrace a new year there's often a focus on resolutions, goals, and change; all of which have purpose. The concept often neglected during this time of year is that of acceptance. Sometimes we want things to be different so badly that we "white-knuckle" new behaviors, only to slip back into our old habits. [...]
As we approach the upcoming Thanksgiving Holiday there is an increasing focus on the concept of gratitude. Gratitude, which rhymes with "attitude," comes from the Latin word gratus, which means "thankful, pleasing." If you struggle with the concept of gratitude, you are not alone. Commonly, people say "how can I be grateful when I am [...]
When conflict happens, it is natural to want to point the finger at the other party emphasizing what “they” need to change. Perhaps blaming is a defense mechanism or simply an easy way out. No matter how we label it, this strategy seems to be ineffective in making sustainable change in our personal lives and [...]
“A real sign of progress is when we no longer punish ourselves for our imperfections” - Yung Pueblo Imperfection is a part of the human condition. In some cultures, a damaged or broken item is viewed as more precious than it was in its pristine form. So, if this is the case, then why do [...]
How do you want to live your life? What a powerful question and one that is likely very challenging to answer. Consider this poem by Oriah Mountain Dreamer called “The Invitation”. I remember reading this for the first time about ten years ago and I continue to come back to it at different times throughout [...]
Over the past week we've talked a lot about emotional validation. Throughout these conversations there have been numerous questions and struggles in both understanding and practicing this important skill. I've also noticed that we try to complicate something that can actually be quite simple if we allow it to be. Here goes an effort to [...]
I've been noticing something when it comes to the topic of self love and self respect; it seems many of us are not very good at it. It's almost as if others are deserving of this yet somehow we are not. For example, when someone else makes a mistake we can offer warmth and forgiveness [...]
The holidays tend to be filled with food, family, and inevitably some amount of emotional distress. Here are some things for you to consider in preparation for your Thanksgiving: - What do you need to do to ensure your nutritional needs are met throughout the course of the entire day? Some thoughtful planning around this [...]
The process of recovery is grueling at times. It is painful and requires consistent work. Because of this, it begs the question of “Why?”. “Why put in all of the work?”. “Why commit time and resources?”. “Why recover?”. If you haven’t ever taken time to genuinely ask yourself these questions, please do. If you can’t [...]